


Amazing grace

by beyond_the_nights_world



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Wings, Angelic Grace, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, Human Castiel, Loss of Grace, Love Confessions, M/M, Night, Snow, Stars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 06:48:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12576064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beyond_the_nights_world/pseuds/beyond_the_nights_world
Summary: Dean has a very special Christmas gift for the former Angel Castiel.





	Amazing grace

**Author's Note:**

> I know, it's a little early for Christmas. But why not having a little snowy fluff

The snowflakes were floating softly around the old trees and sailing down onto the icy snowcovered surface of the garden. Cas had not been able to sleep and now he stood, with a cup of tea in the hand wrapped into a warm blanket onto the porch and observed the flakes falling.

It was his first winter as a human being and he fall for this season. It was so calm and peaceful like the whole world was sleeping. The snow was twinkling in the silvery moonlight and thousands of stars covered the dark sky with their shine, when the clouds lightens up.

Cas curled his hands around the warm mug, drinking the hot tea slowly. He already felt a little frozen, one of the things he didn't like of being human. Freezing, sweating, being at the mercy of nature. Although he felt stiff and chilly, he stayed.

To see the wonders of nature helped him to forget his situation for a while. To see the stars, the snow falling, to hear the wind in the wood made it easier for him. This were experiences he loved and in such moments it was easy for him to be human. So he tried to keep them in his mind, soak them up like a dry sponge the water.

He heared footsteps coming closer and he didn't have to turn his head to know that it was Dean who joined him out here.

“Such a peaceful night”, Dean whispered after a moment of silence and turned his head towards Cas. Snowflakes had become lost in the dark hair of the angel. He was shivering a bit, although he had cocooned himself into a woolen blanket. A holy and also deeply sad expression lay on his face.

“I am so old... nearly as old as all this here and I never really realized how beautiful this is. Christmas was a fest for the birth of Jesus Christ and the humans turned into something more. This made me really happy. But I also feel so sad. This time, this place. Sitting together with you Mary and Sam under the tree, eating pie, laughing, singing, being happy. This is so filled up with kindness... with,” he was sobbing and his voice cracked a bit.

“Filled with grace?” Dean continued and Cas just nodded not looking at Dean. He felt embrassed and childish because of longing after his grace and he thought that he had to be thankful for the chance to live at all. But he missed his grace, his life as an angel with all the abilities and possibilities this life had given him.

“I feel ungrateful and egoistic. I have learned so much, I have learned about feelings I don't want to miss...”, he looked up at Dean and when he saw the understanding tender smile on the face of him, Cas felt a rush of blood rising into his cheeks. “I...I... this is confusing.”

He looked back into the dark garden, trying to handle this all, as he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“This is a hard time for you”, Dean started, rubbing the shoulder of his fellow, his friend, his angel.

With his free hand he nestled inside his jacket and pulled out a small wooden box.

Than he released Cas shoulder and took the mug out of his hand, placing it onto the railing of the porch. The angel looked and him surprised.

“What are you doing?”

Dean didn't really know by himself. For a few seconds he felt relaxed, but that changend within seconds. He thought it was easy, but he was afraid of Cas' reaction.

“This is a christmas present for you”; he said, laying the box into the hand of the angel.

“A gift? For me? But I already get one from you?” Cas didn't get, why Dean hadn't gave him this small gift during their celebration time.

“I know. But I was too cowardly... Please, open it...or I will die of curiosity.”

He wanted to see Cas' face, hoping to see him smile.

“Okay. I will open it.” He lifted the cap and when he saw a bright shiny phial, his mouth fall open. This must be a joke, a really bad christmas prank.

“This...uhm... is this...”

He starred at the phial, unable to touch it. The silvery filling was shining brightly, covering his face in a holy light.

“This is your grace, Cas.”, Dean sad carefully

“My grace? How?....Why?....What have you done to get my grace back, Dean? I mean...this is...”

He was stuttering. He was holding his life in his hand, a gift of uncountable worth.

“Someone had to do me a favor, so don't worry Cas”; Dean smiled. Cas didn't have to know, how he convinced Crowley to handle him Cas Grace.

“But why? Why did you do this for me?”

Cas was holding his grace in his hands and he was looking at it like a child who sees the ocean for the first time. Curious, overwhelmed and so unbelievable loveable that Dean just wanted to hug him, hold him tight.

“I saw your sadness, I saw your pain and it drives me crazy to see you like this. You have done so much for me, have risked so much. You went to hell and back, just to save me. And you saved me every day, you are here with me.” He raised his hand, cupped Cas face.

“God damn, I need you... I... love you. And I want you to feel complete again.”

Dean heard the words he was saying and nearly regret them. What if he broke something right now, because Cas didn't feel the same?

“I... I am sorry, Cas.” His hands fall down and he dropped his gaze to the floor, waiting for the disenchantment.

“This is the greatest gift, you could make. And I mean not my grace.”

Dean felt Cas grabbing his hand, he felt him leaning the forehead against his own.

“I feel the same for you...but I never know, how to tell you. This is complicated.”

They just stand there, holding hands, leaning against each other, enjoying this moment of peace and joy.

“I don't want to be unromantic, but could you get your grace now, so that we can move in. There are important parts of my body frozen over.”

Dean heard the angel chuckle and felt him slightly moving.

“I appreciate not to risk this”, he smiled and stepped down the stairs until he stood right in the middle of the garden.

He didn't know how he would react, when he took his grace back. It always was different and sometimes it even was kind of destructive.

With a careful movement he opened the phial and the silvery liquid was floating out, hanging in the air like fog. Then he inhaled it.

Dean observed him. He saw the grace penetrating Cas. Then it went dark and for a few seconds nothing happened, so that Dean was afraid that Crowley had prankd him.

But than it started. His angel started to glow. It began on the height of the heart. A pulsating bright light, warm and shiny, began to spread over Castiel and covering his whole body. It was scary and beautiful at the same time. He thought this bright light was all he would get to see, but than it happened. Dark wings grew up behind the back of the angel. The feathers traversed by a silvery shine. They grow bigger and bigger and when he spread them, they seemed to cover the whole sky with their blackness.

The light was fading, the wings disappearing slowly and Cas stood in the snow, smiling at Dean thankfully.

Dean putting out his hand.

“Come on, my snowangel.”

 


End file.
